10:00 / WOMEN'S VOLLEYBALL (Beach 1 Utility Courts) -- Age 18+
Directors: Judy and Carole Fortenbach 973-764-4659
Lots of fun! Join in the zany court antics anytime! Start date: July 5
It was the week after the United States, Highland Lakes Volleyball Classic (party). The players that gathered on the court were serious about the games that were to come. “Gallant Gail” started by announcing to everyone that she was shedding, which was followed by the question. “What the heck is going on”? That’s exactly what I wanted to know said “Notorious Knox” who got busy working on her squatting talents and her slightly off returns. “Lacerating Lynette” once again (she seems possessed) talked about taking her thing apart, but then thought better of it. “Galloping Gail” stole a few moves from “Notorious” by running around in a circle before the ball was served – it didn’t help! “Varsity Val” did a leaping pirouette (her first one and hopefully last one ever) to make a point. While “Kool Kathy” was okey dokeying, “Launching Lauren” was busy giving a running commentary on every play, followed by where am I? This exasperated “Menacing Marsha” who, with a big sigh, then proceeded to calmly explain the rules of volleyball to everyone. We even had a player from the past show up – “Crafty Cathy” told everyone that she was walking the dog and thought of us, so she decided to come over and teach us how to dive for a ball. She played like she had never left.
Our last game was August 30th. Next year’s Newsette will have a photo of our first, second and third place (maybe more) winners from the United States, Highland Lakes Volleyball Classic. Make sure you look for it.
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August 9th - The sun was bright and high in the sky, which was a problem. Every time the ball was returned, it got lost in the sun, at least that was the excuse that was used by "Bouncing Bono" just before she told everyone, "We're all in sync." It didn't take long for "Hurricane Hastie" to dive across the court for a return shot during a volley. This action caused "Killowatt Keva" to say something about criticizing teammates, one should or one shouldn't, we're not sure what she said because we were too busy watching her flipping about making graceful turns at the net. "Kool Kathy", after smashing the ball hard into the net, tried to intimidate "Menacing Marsha" by yelling, "You would have been dead (if the ball went over the net instead of into it)." "Menacing" wasn't fazed at all and continued to place the ball exactly where she wanted to. "Dazzling Diana" got caught up in the fierce competition and almost hit her teammate in the face twice, instead of her opponent. "Notorious Knox" tried out a new dance step to help obtain points for her team while "Launching Lauren" (who returned for the first time this year) tried laughing and apologizing for points. While all this was going on, a lot of good volleys took place. "Tenacious Teri" came with a new look and played like she was an Olympic prospect. "Gallant Gail" took offense at being called old and viciously kicked the ball at the offender. "Varsity Val" tried a new approach, calling the ball out when it was actually out, hoping the opposition wouldn't believe her and go for the ball. She then told her teammates, "I'm using psychological stuff." "Killer Krol" came late again but managed several saves and good returns. "I don't need the practice that all the others do," she said. "Galloping Gail" on several occasions didn't have to gallop after the ball; instead she jumped for it, making points for her team. "Laser Lynette" told everyone that she wasn't taking her thing apart as much as she used to. We were all glad.
August 16th - The day was supposed to turn rainy and stormy but the skies went from overcast to sunny blue. Not only was it volleyball game day but it was also the volleyball party day!
Everyone was ready to begin the games and they started with a fury. "Varsity Val" went flying across the court after a point, calling out, "I'm moving and this train doesn't stop," which made everyone move out of the way. The fury continued and after a ferocious volley, "Dazzling" Diana tried to wrest the book of secret plays out of the hands of a sweet, innocent player without success. "Laser" Lynette, who was exploring many new techniques, was verbally attacked by "Menacing" Marcia when she missed one play.
"Menacing" was trying to destroy "Laser's" confidence but it didn't work because "Tenacious" Teri bolstered "Laser's" feelings by telling her she didn't have her thing out. "Laser" said she was dizzy from all the hard playing. On the very next play, "Gallant" Gail raced across court, reaching for the ball with such determination that her hair blew back against her grimacing face.
Meanwhile, "Galloping" Gail kept telling everyone that she was playing with a bad back, trying to gain some sympathy. It didn't work. Just then, a serve was delivered like a rocket from "Lacerating" Lynne and as it soared over the net, "Dazzling" exclaimed, "I couldn't get it over because I'm left handed." Then when "Launching" Lauren and "Varsity" both reached for the same volley they collided and "Varsity" was heard to state, "I have a hole in my hand. Do you have one too?" When "Launching" nodded in the affirmative, "Varsity" said, "cool".
Now the serving switched sides and it was the opposition's turn to serve. The ball was quickly given to "Bouncing" Bono who said, "crap!" This was a clever ploy of "Bouncing's" to throw the opponents off guard. As "Kool" Kathy reached up to return the serve, she pulled 27 muscles in her shoulder and while she received sympathy from her teammates, the opposition ran over and punched, pinched, and kicked her. They said it would make her feel better but she didn't believe them. "Notorious" Knox said it didn't matter how much her arm hurt as long as she hit the yellow line and not the white line when she served.
The games ended but not the frivolity because all went to the volleyball party where more ridiculous events took place.
Only one more week left for volleyball, Thursday at 10AM at the all-purpose court at Beach #1. Come and join us!
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The heat and humity couldn't keep the volleyball women off the court last week as 17 players came out to play. And play they did for 2 hours in the sun and heat and they were all fantastic. "Nimble" Nancy showed up for the first time in two years and "Hurricane" Hastie showed up after three years, but also demonstrated to one and all that she had not lost her touch since she last played with this group. (Both "Nimble" and "Hurricane" said we were all as crazy as ever).
When "Galloping" Gail mentioned that "Kool" Kathy was "too hot today", "Menacing" Marcia became annoyed and kicked "Kool" under the net, knocking her down. "Kool" was unfazed and jumped right up even though her feet were sticking to the court. While changing sides, "Varisty" Val elbowed an opponent because she didn't like the score. Nevertheless, play resumed and everyone concentrated on their game. During one long serving streak, "Lazer" Lynette was heard to posture, "I keep thinking I have to change my thing for her." About this time the Vernon Police arrived and decided to keep us under surveillance. They became mesmerized by our play and would not leave. This made "Dazzling" Diana nervous and when her teammates called her for help, she said, "I can't help you anymore." "Bouncing" Bono understood what she was saying as "Bouncing" quipped. "I'm too busy holding up my teammates."
Play continued in the heat. "Notorious" Knox was heard to yell the score (southern style) "Faave to teen" while "Gallant" Gail eyed her teammates because they weren't giving enough help to "Notorious". Even though "Killer" Krol, a.k.a., "One-Arm" Krol, was playing ferociously, (her hat flew off twice during play) she was heard to say, "nice fighting ladies" when others surpassed her ferociousness. "Lacerating" Lynne continued with her dynamic serving and "Killowatt" Keva was like a dancer all over the court. A newcomer joined us on this day, "Tenacious" Teri and she was amazed to learn that all the things written in the volleyball articles were true. "Tenacious" said, "you are wonderful women; terrible volleyball players, but wonderful women."
Join us on Thursday morning at 10AM at the Beach #1 all purpose court.
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Even the hot, steamy day couldn't tire the players, at least until the very last game. "Varsity Val" started the games by announcing that she was playing in the past and that she thought she was wrong. The scary part was that her team seemed to know exactly what she was talking about! Shouts of, "I got it," came from "Notorious Knox" all morning long as "Bouncing Bono" told everyone that she was saving her head, she also made several unreturnable serves. Speaking of unreturnable serves, "Lacerating Lynne" was really punishing her opponents when "Gallent Gail" was heard trying to explain why the ball wasn't being returned by saying, "Tall women can't jump," and then RAN across the court to get the ball. "Kool Kathy" was a whirling blur, while "Galloping Gail" was all over the court. "Dazzling Diana" and "Killer Krol" had several cross net volleys with each other, and no one else was allowed to participate. "Lazer Lynette" accussed one player of not being truthful about the score, so "Menacing Marsha" attempted to diffuse the situation by saying that her big toe hurt. She also said something about action and no talking. "Karate Kim" left early because her team lost, but vowed to come back next week because the directors were such kind and loving women. We end with a quote from a fan, "Nice movement without the ball." I think he was watching all of us!
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Thunderstorms and rain were all about last week but it didn't dare rain on the volleyball women. Clouds were threatening but the women just stared at the sky, gave it a scowl and the few drops that fell stopped and held off until we finished playing. There was no warm-up again, just right to the games. "Dazzling" Diana and "Karate" Kim showed for the first time this season. "Karate" drove into the games with vim and vigor and "Dazzling" showed her team a thing or two with her spectacular plays. On one hard smash, "Gallant" Gail jammed her fingers (while gallantly trying to save a point) and wanted everyone to kiss them better for her... she had no takers; her injury didn't lower her level of play however. "Menacing" Marcia was being watched by the opposing team and they were in awe of her fast reactions. One player even commented, "How do you think so fast?" "Menacing" wouldn't tell her.
There was a lot of chatter and talking besides a lot of grunts, groans and some strange, unidentifiable noises coming from the court during play. This didn't bother "Kool" Kathy as she gave her marionette impersonation while completing play after play which stymied the opposing team. Feet were seen racing this way and that (mostly that) while "Notorious" Knox, who had no breakfast, slammed the ball over the net like she had eaten ten Power Bars. "Lascerating" Lynne not only served like a pro, but was hot at the net as well and "Kilowatt" Keva demonstrated her pirouette form on many of her returns. There was a brief pause as several players talked about how much they liked the new shirts, and then the fierce play resumed. Noses were hit, "Laser" Lynette's arm came out of it's socket as she saved the point and "Bouncing" Bono made some fantastic returns after being exasperated about her one volley as the ball was hit to her over and over and she smashed it back each time. All the games were very close with two games going into "overtime".
We play every Thursday morning at 10 at the utility court at Beach #1. Join us!
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What a day for volleyball, what a group for volleyball! The games got underway without much warm-up because everyone was ready to play.
"Laser" Lynette announced that she had a bad shoulder but that did not slow her down as she smashed many shots over the net with one arm. "Kool" Kathy tried to confuse everyone by calling hits that were out, in, before they landed, and hits that were in, out. "Varsity" Val said she was getting confused because volleys that were out, were in; those that were in were in were out; some that were in were in; some that were out, were out and whew! "Varsity" threw up her hands commenting, "I forgot where I was." She did, however, give her team some sage advice telling them, "If we keep the ball going, we'll get it." Play was halted at this point while large rocks (really pebbles, we tend to exaggerate everything) had to be removed by the server. "Bouncing" Bono confused everyone (not a hard thing to do) by serving in a new way, while "Kilowatt" Keva took over her section of the court and returned the ball again and again even though she would bump, push, poke, etc. her teammates. She would then sweetly apologize and all would be forgiven, what a wonderful woman! Meanwhile, "Notorious" Knox kept everyone astounded with her squat returns of the ball. "Jumping" Jill, who arrived late (one demerit) demonstrated to the back line her unreturnable serve. "Menacing" Marcia kept everyone honest by keeping track of the score. This was no mean feat because when "Lacerating" Lynne served, the score changed quickly. "Galloping" Gail lived up to her name by covering the whole center of the court. "Jaunty" Jeanie got disgusted with her team and decided to leave early but announced she would return next week.
Come join these wonderful women on Thursday mornings at 10:00AM on the all-purpose court at Beach One.
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Even before the games began, "Kool Kathy" was told that her earlobe was drooping. She then tried to confuse everyone by telling them that she has six children (she doesn't). "Notorious Knox" showed up with a helmet for protection, which didn't help her either. Okay, now to the games. The volleys between the teams were impressive with grunts and screams (the groans will come in the morning). "Varsity Val" (who forgot her name) scared half the opposition with one of her primal screams at the net, while "Gallant Gail" quietly kept making serving points. "Lascerating Lynn" tried to gain sympathy by talking about her herniated disk, but none was gained. "Laser Lynette" tried using the new mom excuse, but that didn't work either. "Bouncing Bond" said she was sick of all the talk and let her amazing saves do all the talking. "Kilowatt Keva" was also astounding with her serves. Newcomers, "Galloping Gail" (who was literally galloping all over the court) and "Jumping Jill", who jumped for many balls hit over her head, showed that they came to play and teach the old timers a few lessons, but no one listens to anyone else anyway, so everyone continued playing oblivious to what was going on around them. "Killer Krol" arrived late (keeping her reputation safe for another year) and immediately made a difference in the score with her famous one arm smashes. At the end of the games, horns were honking and spectators were clapping at the outstanding level of play that had taken place.
Join us on Thursday mornings at 10AM on the all purpose court at Beach One.
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Volleyball has begun and the dazzling play will be reported on next week (we are always one week behind in reporting due to printing deadlines). If you missed the first week, don't miss the second week because we get better every week and by the end of the summer we reach perfection! We play at 10AM on the utility (all purpose) court at beach one every Thursday. See you there!
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Before we know it, the volleyball will be flying over the net (the fence, the bushes, you name it). We will begin our season on Thursday, July 5th at 10AM on the all purpose court by the main road at Beach 1. So get your sneakers all ready, polish your badges and come our for another season of fun. For those of you who might think that you’re not good enough to play, let me say this, half of us face the wrong way when we play and the other half don’t realize it!
Hope to see you on the 5th.